Lost Love
by crashing-avalanches
Summary: They didn't want to forget each other, but they moved on. However, sometimes the heart can overrule the mind, reuniting people who thought that they would never love each other again.
1. Chapter 1

**How can you get back a heart that has completely lost you? Why is fate so cruel? Is this really a love...that can never be?**

Lelouch looked up through dark shades at his two children playing on the field. His son Alvin raced around with his twin sister after him. The two of them had just arrived in Japan and they were thrilled with what they saw. Lelouch sighed as he closed his book and relaxed his hands, placing them under his chin.

"You seem tired."

Lelouch looked up as a familiar redhead stood to attention beside him. He looked up her and smiled irrevently. "You know me just too well, don't you, Q-1?" The Japanese ace scowled slightly before directing her gaze back to the two children back on the field. Andrea was now pulling up small flowers while Alvin hovered protectively.

"Why isn't Her Highness Princess Shirley here?" asked Kallen Stadfeld, reverting back to formality for no reason. Lelouch frowned at her words.

"Kallen, there's no need for formality. And why are you standing to attention? This is your house after all," asked the raven-haired man asked. Kallen stared at the children before turning to him. There was the fire in her eyes that he hadn't seen since he reclaimed his right to the throne.

"You wouldn't come here without Shirley without a reason, Lelouch," she whispered. Lelouch didn't answer her directly. Instead, he smiled and stood up. Clapping his hands, he called, "Al, Andrea, its time to eat. You two don't want to miss Jeremiah's cooking, wouldn't you?" The two children scooted to his side immediately and hugged his legs. Alvin looked up and saw the redhead looking at the three of them intently.

"Papa, who is that girl? Isn't she a Knight of Rounds? I've seen her picture on the list before," Alvin asked his father innocently as he detached himself to stand in front of the Japanese Red Lotus. Andrea attempted to twist her head around to see what her brother was looking at, but only succeeded in coming face to face with her father's gentle hands. Lelouch lifted her up into his arms and set here down in front of Kallen, where she looked up into the face of the Japanese ace.

"She's the reason why I'm here," Lelouch replied to his son softly before looking Kallen with an expression so tender which the children had never seen him use on their mother before. Kallen looked at him curiously, meeting his eyes before averting her gaze, a faint blush spreading across her face. However, she did well to hide it, having done it continuously during her days as a Black Knight and a student at Ashford.

"Your Highness, dinner will be served in the dining room shortly, so please make your way there. May I please excuse myself so that I can make myself presentable?" Kallen asked with a bow and with her head down. The children were in awe of her quiet voice, obedient yet strong at the same time. Lelouch sighed before extending his hand to her.

"Of course you can. This is your house, is it not? And please skip the formalities, Kallen. Really, there's no need to be so formal with me, Q-1," Lelouch told her, his voice growing softer with every word. Kallen hesitated before straightening up.

"Very well then, if you insist, _Lelouch_," she said, emphasizing on his name, before ignoring his outstretched hand. Swiftly, she turned her back on them and exited gracefully through the back doors. Lelouch watched her back thoughfully, his lips turning up at the corners slightly. Alvin nudged his sister, who was staring open-mouthed at Kallen's retreating back, ignoring her brother's excited nudges. Then, she turned to her father with a questioning look on her face.

"Dad, did you say that she is your Q-1? Was she the one, your ace that fought for you in the rebellion and protected you to the very end?" Lelouch looked at his daughter before answering, "Yes, she is the one." For a moment, he looked very lonely indeed. Then, he walked towards the ebony wood doors, his children followed him. Both wondering why their father was behaving like this.

**Well, this is it. My first Code Geass fanfic, in fact it is my first fanfic... Never mind, just read and review this first chapter of Lost Love. Thanks! I do not own Code Geass, but I do own my brain and my imagination! xD**

**-****砕け散った夢わそえｒわ私信じての奇跡****-**


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey kids, how was my cooking today?"

Jeremiah's voice echoed cheerfully from the kitchen. Andrea and Alvin were eating under the watchful eyes of their father, his plum eyes missing nothing as they ate with proper ettique. Just then, a young man emerged from the shadows with a glass of wine on a tray. He had pale blue eyes and his tousled blonde hair was both untidy yet appealing at the same time. He placed the glass of wine in front of Lelouch and arranged a set of napkins and utensils as well. Lelouch averted his gaze from his children to look at the young lad.

"Thank you, Lance."

"It's fine, your Majesty." The young man named Lance answered quietly. Lelouch took a sip of his wine before folding his arms and looking at Lance. "So tell me, when did you start becoming her personal bodyguard?" He asked casually, tilting his chair to look up at the ceilling. Lance remained quiet before answering, "After she became a Knight of Round, she asked me to accompany her to Britannia for the inaugration ceremony. Apparently, she trusted me the most. After that, I began assisting her in various missions. So now, I cook for her with Sayako and also accompany her wherever she goes, except when she doesn't want it..."

Lance's voice trailed off. Lelouch looked to be deep in thought, but he snapped out of his reverie when Lance finished. The twins had finished eating by then and were looking up at him expectantly, waiting for him to dismiss them. "Sayako, Jeremiah," at the sound of his voice, the two of them appeared at the sound of his voice, "Take them to bed and do the 'you-know-whats'." The two of them nodded obediently, understanding that he needed to speak with his Q-1 in private. As the children were ushered upstairs, Kallen walked down, dressed in a simple white collared shirt and black shorts with her now long hair slightly damp from her shower. Lance immediately disappeared into the kitchen and reappeared with another set of utensils and some beef stew as well as a bottle of wine. With a flick of her hand, Kallen dismissed Lance and popped open the wine bottle, which was apparently the same one that had supplied Lelouch's wine.

"So, what do you want with me this time?" The Red Lotus's eyes were weary as she poked her spoon into the stew. Lelouch sighed before digging into his own portion. There was silence as the both of them ate quietly for a few minutes before Lelouch took the initiative to start the conversation.

"How are doing so far?" Kallen's mouth dropped open at the question but she closed it immediately._ He came down all the way from the mainland just to ask me that?_ Composing herself, she replied in a neutral tone. "Just fine. The Black Knights are pleased that I am Britannia's ambassador to them. They wouldn't accept anyone else." Lelouch smiled slightly at the answer. "What about _you_?" she asked. He flipped his hand before taking a sip of wine and answering, "You know, the same. Odysseus is fidgeting and Schenizel and Cornelia are nagging at him. Euphie's pretty trying to help, but the poor girl has no talent with politics. Even Nunnully is doing better as an ambassador to the EU." With that, he finished his meal and looked at the redhead in front of him, whose tired cerulean eyes where reflected in her wineglass.

"What do you want, Lelouch? You wouldn't leave Shirley alone and come here with your children. I know you better than that, don't try to fool me. You're up to something, Lelouch, I can tell." Lelouch didn't answer. Instead, he stared his wineglass for a few minutes before putting his hand over Kallen's on the table. Instinctively, Kallen jerked away but Lelouch met her eyes and said "Don't." so quietly and softly that she didn't know how to react. He pulled her to her feet before leading her to the rose garden behind her house. They stood there in silence before Lelouch looked at Kallen tiredly.

"You left me to lead my own life seven years ago, Kallen. You told me to marry Shirley for appropriate reasons and you continued to fight for the new world that you helped to create. We barely saw each other, only at public events and later, Shirley was pregnant. You were there to congratulate us after their birth, but you left as suddenly as you came." Kallen lowered her eyes, recalling the day that Alvin and Andrea were born. Then, she answered.

" I had my own things to do, Lelouch. I couldn't just be there for my own selfish reasons; Schenizel needed me to endorse a court case and I couldn't refuse..." She tugged her hand from his and wrapped her arms around herself tightly. Lelouch stared at her disbelievingly. Out of all people, she had chosen _Schenizel_ to comply?

"Why was that?" He asked quietly. Kallen stared at the ground and closed her eyes. "You know, besides being a Knight of Round and Britannia's ambassador to the Black Knights, I also work for the Supreme Court of Britannnia." Lelouch's gaze intensified, he knew that she had been accepted after finishing her studies in law after three years but this was going too far. His fists clentched and he swore that Schenizel was going to pay for making Kallen suffer like this when he already knew that she was already busy enough.

"Can't you just..." "Refuse him?" Kallen finished his sentence in a bitter voice. She seated herself on the bench among the roses and smiled bitterly. "He was just so..." Her words trailed off as she stared into the night. Lelouch stared at her, refusing to believe that his Q-1 was actually so soft when it came to his brother, his smug, arrogant brother. "You could have just told me..." "And give you more trouble than you already have?" Kallen finished in a monotone. He stared at her, this was not what she was like, this was not the Q-1 that he knew, the Kallen that could speak up for herself and defend others briliantly at the same time.

"What has Schenizel been doing to you?" This came from the prince in a very tired and quiet voice. Kallen whipped her head around to gaze at him.

"What has he been doing to me? What do you mean by that?" Kallen asked uncomprehensively. Lelouch held her gaze before answering stoutly, "Has he been courting you or something?" At the mention of that sentence, its was Kallen's turn to don the disbelieving look. Just then, raindrops pattered down into the grass before them. The drops drenched both Zero and Q-1, but neither of them made to get up and go to shelter._

**The second Chappie is UP! Well? has Schenizel been courting Kallen, or has she been seeing someone else? What does Lelouch plan to do? Will Kallen refuse what he is planning in his scheming mind? I'll update as soon as possible~ xD**

**-****砕け散った夢わそえｒわ私信じての奇跡****-**


	3. Chapter 3

"What were you thinking?"

Kallen's voice was devoid of emotion as she stared at the ebony-haired man in front of her. He shook his head before grabbing her hand and pulling her to the house. She complied, the shock from his former question still shaking her body. Lelouch felt her tremble against him as he grasped her hand and pulled her back into the sanctuary of her house. Pushing open the doors , he gently led her up to her room, peeking into the room that the twins were sleeping on their way there. His two children slept peacefully as they curled up to each other. He stopped outside Kallen's room, waiting for her to push him away and slam her door once she got in. However, she leaned against the wall, her cerulean eyes diverted to the ground at her feet. Seeing that she wasn't going to resist, he led her into her room and seated her on her bed.

Seeing her towel on a chair, Lelouch took it and began drying her hair gently. His action was halted by a pair of battle-roughened hands and he lowered his head to meet questioning azure eyes. Kallen's hands still trembled slightly as she looked up into the eyes of the man that she had loved and followed blindly, even though he was behind a mask that time.

"What made you think that?" Her voice shook slightly like her body as she forced herself to meet the mesmerising eyes of the man that had charmed her eight years ago. Lelouch pressed his forehead against hers and closed his eyes, his hands dropping the towel to run his fingers through her aburn tresses. Kallen was taken aback by his actions but her hands moved to thread their way into Lelouch's raven locks. She closed her eyes in turn, inhaling his scent deeply, calming down with every breath. It had been some time since they had indulged in each other's company like this.

"What made me think like that?" Lelouch whispered, his breath against her lips. The realization of how close they were dawned on Kallen suddenly. As she moved her hands to Lelouch's chest to push him off, he grabbed her wrists and forced her down on the bed, pressing his forehead against her shoulder. Kallen was suddenly rendered helpless, once again vulnerable to the man that she swore to forget. That familar sensation of him seeking comfort in her arms again was too much for her too bear.

"Forgive me, Kallen..." Lelouch whispered into her shoulder, "However, please let stay like this for a while..." Kallen stared ahead before asking, "Why me, Lelouch? Of all people-?" She was silenced by the brushing of Lelouch's lips on her neck. He trailed down to her collarbone before resting his head on her shoulder. The redhead sighed before twitching her fingers to stroke his hair as Lelouch released her wrists to wrap his arms around her. Kallen melded herself to Lelouch as he slipped her arms around her waist, pulling her closer. He rolled down onto her bed, pulling her into the warmth of his arms. Kallen sighed as he stayed where he was, her arms holding him close as well.

"Tell me, did Schenizel try courting you at first?" Lelouch asked. Kallen giggled softly as he asked her that question. He loosened his embrace slightly so that he could look at Kallen, his Q-1. "And may I ask why Mr Married Zero is asking me all these questions?" Kallen shot back at him. Lelouch looked at her in surprise, rendered speechless for the moment. Kallen giggled again, softly before her face turned serious and her hand against his chest turned still.

"You are a married man Lelouch, not only are you a prince of Britannia, you are also the saviour of all the Areas. You are an influential person, why come looking for me at a time like this? You have Shirley, your children and your family that still loves you although you've rebelled against them. Aren't you satisfied?" Kallen's questions came tumbling out one after another. Lelouch tightened his arms around her before whispering so softly that she could barely hear him.

"It's because that I don't have you, that's why I am not satisfied."

Kallen froze at those words. Lelouch pulled her closer to him, his breath tickling her neck. "I want you back in my life so badly, Kallen. I really need you back, I don't think I can actually go on..." His voice broke down as Kallen felt his warm tears falling down her neck. She had never seen him so helpless, so broken down. Her arms went around his neck automatically, comforting him. He pulled away from her, his tears streaming down his cheeks, the amethyst eyes were just like that day...

_"Just like I thought, you came here after all, eh?"_

_ He was sitting on a steel beam, he didn't hear her approach and his head jerked up to look at her. She slowly walked towards him, looking around the ghetto that slowly being rebuilt. "This was where everything started with you, this was where Zero was born, where you gave us hope..." Her voice trailed off as she registered the object held in his hand. _

_ "Lelouch...that is..."_

_ "Yes, it's Refrain."_

_ She had flinched back at the name of the drug, the drug that had made her mother so broken down...and yet he was here ready to inject that...vulgar thing into his veins. Just because he couldn't get his sister back? That wasn't Zero..._

_ "You can go back to the good ol' days with it, don't you know? You should know this better than anyone else, Kallen."_

_ The shock had subsided in her, replacing it with an anger that she had never felt before. Immediately, she grabbed the vial and syringe from him, flinging them to the ground, breaking the vial upon impact. Looking desperately into his face, she screamed, "So what if you can't get her back? Devise another plan then! What do you want me to do? Be a bait, pilot a Knightmare, fight for you? Just tell me what you need me to do!" She had just screamed all of it into his face, not wanting to see him like this..._

_ "Then, comfort me." _

_ His voice was sultry and sad as he said those three words. Slowly, he stood up and walked towards her, seeming to be so tall. As he loomed over her and carressed her cheek, her feet seemed to be glued to the floor and she could only look up at him. "That's something women can do right?" His breath was hot on her face as he leaned in closer, his lips nearly touching her trembling ones..._

_ A slap echoed through the ghetto._

_ He turned back to her, his hand rising up to touch the cheek that was slowly turning red from her slap, a most bewildered expression on his face. "Snap out of it Lelouch! If that's the case, just keep lying to the very end. Perform Zero's act...flawlessly!" The helpless look slowly went out of his eyes, replaced by the look that she knew too well. The scene was still too much for her too bear. Turning on heel, she ran straight out of the ghetto, not turning back when she heard his footsteps after her._

Kallen stared into the plum eyes of Lelouch vi Britannia. No, she couldn't get hurt like last time. But here he was, asking her to be part of his life again, and she was so vulnerable to his charm... Placing her finger on his Geass contact, she gently removed it, placing it on the bedside table before taking his face in her hands.

"I'll be here for you tonight. I'm not going anywhere, I'm all yours for tonight, Lelouch." She whispered. His hand traced down her waist to her thighs, the other cupping her cheek, the amethyst eyes roaming her face as he moved closer to her. His lips touched hers gently before kissing her passionately, his hands moving up and down her body. For once, she obliged to him, returning his searing kisses and letting him have her. Just before th blissful oblivation started, he whispered in her ear softly.

_"Thank you, Q-1"_

**Well...this is it. Sorry, but no lemon, but I was sorta crying when I wrote this, thanks to inspiration from charredfeathers and miyako-dono34. I really should NEVER try writing lemon... **

**Just a little briefing here, cause most of you are confused as I never explained things properly...(damn me!)** **Euphie never became vice-viceroy and they triumphed after defeating the emperor. Clovis was the only casuality, otherwise it follows the anime plot. Zero's identity was revealed after things were taken care of. The royal family knows and also the inner circle of the Black Knights. Kallen went to university to study law while being funded by Britannia due to her status as a Knight of Round. Lelouch married Shirley and had two children...The rest will be revealed later...I'M SO TIRED!**

**-****砕け散った夢わ私信じての奇跡****-**


	4. Chapter 4

Lelouch's eyelids fluttered open as the morning sun shone on his face. The first thing that he registered was Kallen's sapphire eyes looking back into his. He smiled as he reached out to cup her face in his before sliding his arm around her waist to bring her closer.

"Good morning, beautiful." He breathed before pressing his lips to her in a light kiss. She chuckled softly when he pulled away. Just then, a knock sounded on the door and two familar voices sounded outside.

"Jeremiah, Kallen-sama and his Highness should be still asleep. They were together yesterday night..."

"Sorry, Sayako. Despite all that, I still feel that it is my duty to wake his Highness up."

"Cut them a little slack. Besides, it's not a working day and Kallen-sama needs her rest..."

"How can you explain his Highness's absence to his children who are waiting at the kitchen table then?"

Lelouch heard Kallen catch her breath as Jeremiah said that. Before both of them could react, the door banged open and Jeremiah marched in, with Sayako hovering in the doorway anxiously. He didn't seem surprised when he saw Kallen and Lelouch together in Kallen's bed with the sheets covering them. Instead, he knelt down and addressed Lelouch in a formal tone.

"Breakfast is ready and will be served shortly, you Highness. Will you please allow me to escort you to your room so that you can dress?"

"Thank you, Jeremiah. I will meet you in my room shortly afterwards. Please allow me to to get ready, thank you Sayako," Lelouch answering him fluidly. Jeremiah rose immediately with his head bowed.

"As you command, your Highness." Jeremiah exited the room with Sayako closing the door behind both of them, mummuring some rather vague apology. Kallen grabbed him and looked at him terrifiedly.

"How do you explain youself? Don't tell me that you're going to ask for a divorce?" She whispered, her hands shaking on his face. He took her hands and looked at her reassuringly.

"I'll settle this matter," He said soothingly to her. She sighed before sitting up and looking away from Lelouch. He pulled her into his arms and ran his thumbs soothingly over her cheeks, but she showed no sign of relaxing. Instead, he saw in the reflection of the glass that she was staring hard at the floor and her azure eyes were hard and unforgiving. Grabbing a sheet, she pushed him away and wrapped it around her body before lying down on the bed again.

"Go."

That simple word did it. Lelouch made up his mind and pulled her around roughly to face him and claimed her lips. Instead of returning the kiss, she dug her fingers into his hair and forced him away, putting him at arm's length.

"Go."

Her response startled him, but he was feeling rather angry at her for pushing him away like that. Swiftly, he slid off the bed and dressed in his clothes where they had been discarded the night before.

"Very well then."

He rose to leave and just before he closed the door, he caught a glimpse of her reflection in the glass of her cabinet. His Ace's cerulean eyes had softened and to his surprise, there were tears running down her cheeks. However, she didn't look at him as he closed her bedroom door.

As soon Lelouch had left, Kallen stood up and wiped the tears away from her cheeks. Despite that, she still couldn't control them as they flowed down her face. A gentle knock sounded on the door. Calling out in a shaky voice, she asked.

"Who is it?"

"It's only me, my lady, to bring you breakfast." Lance replied as he balanced a steaming breakfast tray on his thigh to reach the doorknob. Kallen drew in a shaky breath. She had learnt to appreciate the man's company over the years and despite of her mood swings and her unstable mental condition, he still remained at her side. Wrapping a blanket around herself, Kalllen called to him that it was alright to come in. Lance opened the doors and came in, setting the breakfast on a table before closing the door and looking at his ladyship. Looking at her red eyes and body covered with the sheet, he knew better than to ask her what was wrong. Instead, he busied himself with pouring her tea and arranging her breakfast.

"Here." He handed her a steaming cup of tea and she reached out with a shaky hand to take it. Looking at her mentally inept condition, Lance sat down beside her and held the cup to her lips. Like a little child, she sipped at the tea timidly. She didn't protest when he set the cup down and fed her a small piece of French toast. Suddenly, she grabbed his wrist with a shaking hand.

"How...how many people know about what happened between me and Le-, his Highness last night?" She asked in a small voice that trembled like her body. Lance put down the fork and grasped his lady's hands in his own, looking deep into her azure eyes.

"Only me, Sayako-san and Jeremiah know," he replied in a quiet voice, clasping her hands gently. "If we don't spread it out, no one will know."What about the children?" She whispered fearfully. Lance stroked her arm gently, trying to calm her down.

"I believe his Highness will take care of that," he replied. Despite his rather unexplained dislike for the newly reinstated prince, Lance was sure that he knew how to take care of his lady. From what he saw, the prince truly loved his Lady Kallen. Her hands tightened on his and she looked at him.

"I made up my mind to forget about him, to never remember him again...but..."

"But you do love him don't you."

His answer shocked Kallen. Looking down, she bit her lip.

"If you truly love him, you should know what to do."

Kallen looked down before releasing her grip on Lance's wrists. She got up and went into her closet. Lance sighed as he looked at the unfinished breakfast before him. From the rustling of clothes, he gathered that she was changing her clothes. He took up the tray before leaving the room, imagining that rage that Sayako would throw at him when she found out that Lady Kallen had not taken much of her breakfast.

Kallen slipped on a simple pink collared shirt and a pair of white shorts before leaning her head against her closet door. She stared down as she recalled what Lance had said.

_"If you truly love him, you should know what to do."_

Kallen clentched her teeth in fustration. She had loved him, so much that she was near the point of sacrificing everything of herself for the man that she had loved so blindly. However, when he had married her best friend like she told him too, her heart had been torn apart. It hurt her so much that she had immediately went home after the wedding and never attended the wedding banquet. She had cried herself to sleep when she found out that they were 'living happily' after their marriage. Kallen held no jealousy against Shirley, but she couldn't believe that Lelouch had actually agreed to marry her.

Later, when she was working herself to exhausation, a word of command came to her that Second Prince Schenizel had wanted to meet her. When she had entered his office and had not even uttered a word of greeting, she had found herself kissed by the supposedly aclaimed bachelor of Britannia. His touch reminded her of Lelouch and she just wanted to drown in it and let herself be owned by this man again. But something told her that this was impossible and she had pushed him off her and slapped him. Schenizel had seemed disappointed by that, but he bothered her no more. He still sent her flowers on a weekly basis though.

Kallen shrugged the matter off like a professional and went downstairs, seeing Lelouch eating breakfast with his children. She nodded at them before taking up the teapot on the table and pouring herself a cup of green tea. Inhaling the strong fumes, she calmed herself down and went to sit down in a couch, sinking into its comfortable depths. Sipping her tea, she thought absent-mindly about what had happened last night. He had dominated her like usual and she had submitted her to him as he moved harder against her and whispered her name like a mantra. Then, he had pulled her into his arms and told her that despite everything that happened, she was the only one that could calm him down and make him feel at peace. They had drifted off to sleep after that, dreamless and sweet.

Sighing, Kallen ran a hand through her aburn tresses, setting the cup down on the coffee table. Just then, Sayako breezed through, setting a plate in front of her and also another pot of tea.

"Thank you, Sayako." The maid raised one eyebrow before refilling her teacup.

"It's so like you to not eat, my lady." Sayako replied indifferently as she pushed the plate of buttered toast towards Kallen. The Red Lotus picked a slice up and bit into it, feeling the butter melt in a mouth. Lance entered the room and set a bouquet of flowers in front of her before moving out. Sayako, seeing that her ladyship was eating her breakfast, exited the room to clear the breakfast table. Kallen pulled the flowers towards her, her lips turning up slightly at Schenizel's choice of chrysanthemums and irises this week. The golden bunches nestled within the pure whiteness of the straight elegant petals. She gently stroked the smooth petals.

"Did Schenizel send you these?"


	5. Chapter 5

Kallen whipped her head around to see Lelouch staring at the bouquet of flowers in her hands. She was so shocked that she dropped them and if it wasn't for Lelouch's quick hands, the beautiful essemble would have been ruined. He set them back on the table and looked at Kallen. He put out his hand and attempted to stroke her cheek but she flinched away from his touch. Sighing, he took a seat before her. Her hands still trembled and her body shook. He looked into her eyes and said in a reassuring voice.

"Now, Kallen, I don't plan on divorcing Shirley. The children are enough proof. Is it alright if you come back to Pendragon and be my knight again? My personal bodyguard, nothing else?" His amethyst eyes pleaded with her. She found herself softening, but she shook her head and looked away.

"No...If I became your personal knight...I would have to abandon my duties as Britannia's ambassador to the Black Knights and also a judge of Britannia's Supreme Court," she replied in a tired voice. Suddenly, gone was the confident persona that could take any court case without fail. Instead, it was replaced with a rather tired girl-self that needed the comfort of a home. She gazed at her cup of tea that was apparently getting cold, an invisble veil had covered her blue eyes and also her soul as well, barring Lelouch access to her feelings. He reached out to her, but she merely leaned back into the comfort of the armchair, shying away from his touch. Lelouch curled his fists up in silent exsperation, but he kept his cool.

"Kallen, I know you don't want me to take you as a second wife for I know you dislike being owned by another man who already has a wife, but that's not the point, I just want you to stay at my side so that I can see that you are safe and sound," he reasoned softly. Kallen smiled bitterly at the prince before taking a sip of her tea, which was still slightly warm. She stared ahead, not looking at him.

"You know that I dislike practicing polygamy as well, so why?" he pleaded. "Why won't you come back to me?" Kallen still stared ahead. She didn't look at him as she smiled softly.

"The problem is that, Lelouch, you left me for too long," she replied bitterly. "I couldn't bring myself to love you anymore when I saw what a happy life you had with Shirley. That's why although I slapped Schenizel, I still let him send me flowers. I thought that if you didn't love me anymore, there would be no point for me to keep loving you. Anyway, Zero is gone as the world is at peace. Why would his Q-1 still exsist then?" She covered her face with her hands and laughed bitterly. Lelouch, however was not satisfied.

"What about him sending you flowers?" Kallen stopped laughing.

"I thought you didn't care about me anymore, so I was free to lead my own life right?" she asked. "Then why does my love life concern you?" Lelouch stared at her, not believing what he was hearing. The girl who had yearned for his trust so much was actually pushing him away. Just then, Lance came in with a cell phone in his hand.

"Milady, Prince Schenizel is on the line."

Kallen reached out for the cell phone and answered it with a "Hello?" Lelouch, being too caught up in his own thoughts, only heard snips of the conversation. As Kallen hung up and stood up, getting ready to leave, Lelouch stared up at her and caught her hand as she was about to leave.

"Where are you going?"

She didn't answer him directly. Instead, she said, " I am going back to the mainland. Prince Schenizel has called me back to endorse a court case and he wants me to preside it. I might as well escort you back there." Tugging her hand free, she went up, calling to Lance to get his own things ready as she headed for her own room. Lelouch could only stare helplessly at her retreating back as she strode up the stairs until Jeremiah's voice jerked him out of his thoughts.

"Your Highness, do you want to get your things and ask the children to leave? Lady Stadfeld's jet will be taking off at 2.30p.m."

"Ah, okay. Get Al and Andrea ready then, and my things too. I need to speak to Kallen for a while," Lelouch answered swiftly as he started up towards the stairs. He walked in as she was throwing her black, knee-length coat over her shoulders.

"You could knock, you HIghness," she stated simply as she expertly fastened the the collar up with a golden pin and a badge in the shape of Britannia's emblem- a snake and a lion entwined. He grabbed her hands as she was adjusting her collar. She stared up at him with questioning eyes as his lips claimed hers in a passionate kiss. Her hands, imprisoned by him, attempted to push him off but he pulled her closer, trapping her between his chest and his arms.

Finally, he freed her, his amethyst eyes glazed over with passion and feeling. Kallen could only stare up at him as he held her in his arms, she couldn't bring herself to hate this man no matter what. The feelings that she had buried away after his marriage suddenly resurfaced and she found herself longing for his touch once more. Lelouch smiled softly as he tilted her head up to observe her expression closer. Then, he laid claim upon her lips again, more passionately and urging than ever. She returned his kiss in esctasy and moaned softly with pleasure as he broke off to trail at her jawline and her neck. The feeling was like heaven...

"Your Highness!"

It was Sayako's voice, shocked and desperate. Kallen suddenly froze in his arms and he looked up, curious. His blood turned cold as he registered the scene at the door.

His children were staring at him with disbelieving expressions on their faces.

**So...what do you all think? Is it good? is it bad? Should I continue? Please...Please...I BEG YOU ALL...give me more feedback! Or else I'll flunk my Chinese class test! (Which is not a good thing by the way...) So if you don't want me to fail my chinese test...GIVE REVIEWS!**


	6. Chapter 6

Lelouch stared in disbelief as he took in the scene of his children standing still in the doorway with Sayako standing behind them, panic gracing her features. His children stared questioningly as Kallen turned so still in his arms that he had to touch her cheek to check that she was still breathing. Her azure eyes were glazed over as she stared at Alvin and Andrea before she started trembling in fear. Her breathing became irregular and she started to panic. Lelouch's attention was immediately drawn back to her panicking condition.

"Kallen!"

At the sound of his voice, Lance immediately rushed in, fully clothed in formal attire. He took Kallen from Lelouch's arms and laid her down on her bed. Sayako, who had dashed off when Kallen had started panicking, came back with a bottle and an asthma pump. Lance expertly supported his lady as Sayako performed the neccessary treatments that would calm her down. Lelouch attempted to approach her when Sayako whispered in a voice so low that he could barely hear it.

"Take care of your children first, you Highness, Lance-kun and I will settle this." She whispered before adjusting the asthma pump. Lelouch nodded before giving his children a stern look and motioning them to follow him as he swept out of the room. Once they were seated in Kallen's living room, the prince turned steel plum eyes on his twin children before crossing his legs.

"What were you doing back there?"

Alvin bowed his head as he comtemplated what to say to his father. His twin who was more straightforward however plunged into the topic right away, looking at her father in the eye.

"What were you doing with Lady Kallen back there?"

Lelouch was amazed by his daughter's bluntness and rather taken aback by her question. His children loved their mother and would do everything to protect her, even going against their father for it. Andrea looked at her father with honey-coloured eyes identical to her mother's, tears welling up in them as she faced her father, the man that she admired, the daddy that she loved and the daddy that she believed that loved her mother with all his heart.

"Andrea, I-"

"Don't deny it, daddy. You were kissing her back then, we heard your conversation last night with her," she shot her brother a look that said "don't deny it". Alvin went on chewing his lip, unsure of what to say as his sister went on. Lelouch narrowed his eyes at her words. For a mere second, he really considered slapping his daughter.

"Andrea vi Britannia, it is terribly wrong to eavesdrop, you know-"

"So what? Daddy, what you are doing right now is terribly wrong as well. What will Mummy think when she sees you having an affair with another woman? The same woman that-"

"-protected me to the cost of her life and sacrified her own happiness for me!" shrieked Lelouch at Andrea before standing up in rage. Despite her anger at her father for kissing Lady Kallen fueling her courage, Andrea shrank back in fear as her father loomed over her with an unforgving air. He looked truly dominating as he glared at her.

"She has every right to love me. She sacrified everything she had for me, during and after the war. Even now, she continues to suffer in silence for my sake. It was all my fault for not admitting my true feelings for her eight years ago! If...if I had done so, she wouldn't be like this! So mentally unstable, so frail, so fragile... Kallen...I really..." Lelouch dropped down on his knees and buried his face in his hands, crying into them. Andrea and Alvin had never seen him like this, especially Andrea, who was horrified at the sight of her father so broken down. She couldn't stand it as she watched her father cry like some woman.

"Enough."

Alvin and Andrea looked around to see Kallen standing in the doorway, supported by an anxious Lance. She looked over the situation with weary eyes and her cerulean eyes settled on Lelouch. Her gaze softened as she took in Lelouch's depressed figure kneeling on the carpet. She shrugged off Lance's anxious hands and walked over to Lelouch, who looked up at her with weary eyes. Her gaze suddenly turned hard and she slapped Lelouch across the face with an angry expression on her face. This earned her an surprised look from Lance and a rather despairing look from Lelouch who stared at her, startled.

"Snap out of it!" she yelled in his face, angry and hurt. "You shouldn't be beating yourself up like this, just for me!" Lelouch stared at her dismayed as Jeremiah suddenly rushed in, his expression anxious.

"Your Highness, Lady Kallen, it happens to be that the E.U. is attacking."

**! This chappie is so SHORT! probably because I had writer's block halfway through...anyway to all of you, I did not flunk my chinese test thanks to your reviews ^^ I think I even passed with flying colours, listening to the teacher say ^^ Thanks ^^ please read and review :)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Forgot to add disclaimer: I do not own Code Geass or its characters. They belong to Sunrise and CLAMP, though it is true that I adore CLAMP ^^ I do own my imagination and my laptop though d(^o^)b**

Kallen and Lelouch reacted without surprise to the statement. Instead, Kallen reached instinctively towards a drawer but immediately threw herself over Andrea as an explosion rocked the house. Lelouch did the same with Alvin as Lance and Jeremiah braced themselves. As soon everything had stopped shaking, Kallen wrenched open the drawer that she had been intending to open and pulled out two guns, handing one to Lelouch.

"Sayako, take his Highness's children to the basement and evacuate them from there."

"Hai, milday."

Kallen gritted her teeth as she pushed Andrea towards Sayako. Lelouch pushed his son towards her as well, telling him to look after his sister before following Kallen into her study. The Red Lotus reached for a hidden switch behind a thick leather-bound book and revealed a secret entrance into a hidden space at the back of her study. Soon, they arrived at a hangar where the Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. was proudly displayed. Kallen tossed aside her black cloak and unbuttoned her shirt, revealing the flightsuit of a Knight of Round. Dropping it on top of her cloak, she stepped out of her pants and prepared to walk up to her Knightmare. Lelouch grabbed her to face him and looked at her in the eye.

"You don't have to do this, Kallen. We can just escape-"

"-and let you be exposed to be the E.U.? I don't think so, your Highness," she shot back at him, zipping up the collar of the flightsuit fully. Lelouch gripped her wrist more tightly as forced her to look at him.

"Kallen, if you get hurt, I won't be able to forgive myself, again," he whispered, his lips a mere millimeters away from hers. His eyes had closed at the word 'again' before his plum eyes opened to look at her pleadingly. She looked at him before taking his head in his hands.

"Please Lelouch, I need to protect you...If you get killed, I will regret it as well...so please..." Kallen closed her eyes before leaning her forehead against Lelouch's. He pulled her into his embrace and stroked her head reassuringly before letting her go and kissing her gently. He looked earnestly at her before letting go of her.

"I will guide your movements, Q-1, just stay alive...for me..." Kallen nodded at his words before jumping onto the line leading to the cockpit. She threw an object at him before sliding into the cockpit. Lelouch caught it in his hand and smiled as he saw that it was a communicator. Putting it on, he walked out of the study, catching the doorframe as another explosion shook the whole house. Sayako appeared, helping him to his feet and guiding him to the basement where he saw Lance typing furiously on a computer. Kallen's face appeared on the screen.

"All preparations done?"

"Yes, milady. Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. prepared to launch."

"Very well, Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. launching!"

Lelouch watched as he joined his children in the evacuation jet, with Sayako and Lance entering as well. The rest of the staff were there also, armed with either guns or knives. Soon, a crismon blur zipped out of the side of the house. Alvin gasped as it settled in the air while Andrea gazed at it, mouth agape with amazement. The Guren S.E.I.T.E.N. was there proudly there. It had been modified as when Earl Lloyd and Rakshata started working together, they had changed all the cockpit designs to the comfortable sitting one, which Kallen pretty much approved of. Its Radiant Wave had also been upgraded and it was also renamed as the Pellinore, after the notorious black knight that had been defeated by King Arthur with Excalibur. Although it was revealed that he became a Knight of the Round Table afterwards, Kallen still much appreciated the name as she was after all still a former rebel. However, the Black Knights still referred to it as the Guren.

Kallen ran all her check tests quickly as she checked the number of enemies surrounding her. _Damn the E.U. Why did they still want to rebel even though their power had been given back to them? _Kallen opened up a private com channel to the Knightmare next to her.

"Why rebel when you have ev-"

"Oh, we didn't get back _everything_ that we wanted," the pilot answered rudely. "You see, although Britannia gave us back our power and our land, but they did not give us back the lives that we lost in fighting. That is why...we will avenge our fallen comrades!" At those words, the Knightmares surrounding Kallen moved towards her all at once.

"Q-1," crackled a familiar voice over her private communicator. "Slash Harkens 45 degrees to the left. Use that opening to get outside so that your movements can be more easy."

"Yes, your Highness!" Kallen responded quickly as she unleashed her Slash Harkens in the directions that Lelouch had indicated. As the Knightmares exploded with the pilots screaming curses to their death, Kallen used the smoke as a cover up and zipped quickly outside the ring of attackers. She turned around and Lelouch's voice immediately sounded.

"Use MVS and fire at those at west, then use technique Alpha to finish those at north," Lelouch spoke calmly as he surveyed the battle scene in front of him, depicted by red dots and other symbols. He spoke into the communinator as his mind worked with impossible speed to decipher the plans of the enemy. Kallen followed his orders with surprising accuracy, leaving him wondering whether she had really been sitting down and doing paperwork these days. Her movements were so swift and smooth, the E.U.'s Sutherlands were no match for the updated Knightmare frame of the Red Lotus. Soon, the Knightmares were cleared and Kallen's voice crackled through the speakers.

"Suzaku just contacted me. You will use Evacuation Route Gama to get back to the mainland. I will get in shortly as soon I deposit the Guren safely in the back of the jet. Sayako, Lance, take them through ER Gama, I will join you all shortly. Make sure that his Highness and his children are safe."

"Yes, my lord." Sayako and Lance replied in unison as they ran the controls. Soon, the evacuation jet propelled forward at the speed of a bullet train. Lelouch heard a familiar voice through the communicator that he still wore.

"Lelouch, would you mind if I speak to you in private for a while? There's a private communication room in the last chamber of the jet. We can talk face to face there."

"Very well then," Lelouch answered, accepting the bag that Sayako handed him before walking to the exit at the back of the chamber. He found that private communication room that Kallen had mentioned and slipped inside, turning on the controls. Soon, Kallen walked in still in her flightsuit.

"Lelouch..."

"You were so good, I thought that you had gone all rusty but apparently you still have your touch," joked Lelouch as he sat down in a chair there. Kallen's eyes narrowed at his words as soon as she heard them. She accepted the bag that Lelouch handed her, but did not open it. Instead, she sat down facing Lelouch and stared at him grimly.

"We seriously need to talk."

**O.o Cliffhanger...I am like so evil...Anyway, give REVIEWS...REVIEWS...! Or I'll go crazy and discontinue...(you have no idea what I can do in fits of despair ^) I really need my first fanfiction to succeed please... By the way, I am also thinking of writing another one-shot, another AU maybe? Please tell me what you think through PMs or my email (you can find it on my profile or on my homepage ^^)**

**That's all for now ^^ Thanks to everyone who has read Lost Love so far ^^ I really heart you all for giving me inspiration to write on...*sniffs**


	8. Chapter 8

Lelouch sensed Kallen's seriousness with the matter and immediately wiped the smile from his face. She stared at him grimly, her mouth forming a thin line. Thoughts raced around his head, trying to think of an excuse that he could back out of this conversation, but for the first time facing Kallen, his mind was completely blank. He stared at her, his hands twisting around one another in grim anticipation.

Kallen fixed her gaze on Lelouch, lines creased her forehead as she found that Lelouch was at a loss of words. Was he really that desperate to have her back? Why was he acting like this? Standing up, she walked over to him and folded her hands over his, looking at him with concerned eyes.

"As much as I want this also Lelouch, we cannot throw away everything just for our own selfish reasons," she whispered. "You have a family, I have responsibilities. People need us, Lelouch," she continued, looking into his eyes with lost expressions. He looked so much like a lost child who was looking for his mother. His purple eyes for once looked lost, that was so unlike his cold ruthless personality as Zero. He pulled her into his arms, warm tears falling down her neck as he cried silently into her shoulder. Kallen wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close as she let him cry into her flightsuit.

"I'm here, Lelouch, I'm not going anyway...not this time."

The private jet touched down as the passengers prepared to leave. There was a large crowd standing at the private touchdown track in front of the large Briannia Royal Manor. Alvin and Andrea were ushered out by Sayako and Jeremiah, followed by Kallen's employees as they milled around protectively. Lelouch was then escorted down by Lance, followed by Kallen, who was adjusting the sleeves of her cloak. Shirley immediately rushed out from the crowd and towards her children.

"Oh, Al, Andrea! Are you all alright? Are you all hurt?" She cried as she enveloped her children in a big hug. Lelouch shot a quick glance at Kallen, who was busy with her right sleeve as she adujusted its length to fit the formality. Just then, Lelouch felt him being hugged tightly by a pair of familar arms.

"Lulu! I'm so glad that you are not hurt in any way! Thank goodness..." Lelouch could only stand still as Shirley wept into his chest, her arms holding him painfully close, his eyes still on Kallen. The Knight of Four flipped her long red hair which was in a braid to her back and ventured forward to greet the rest of the crowd.

"Your-"

"There's no need to do so, Kallen," Cornelia quickly interrupted her, motioning for her to stand up. Euphemia stepped forward and grasped her hands.

"Thank you for returning Lelouch and his children safely," the pink-haired princess said. Kallen bowed her head before the princess.

"It was my duty to protect him, your HIghness," she replied, head still down. Schenizel walked forward and intercepted her from Euphie. He handed her a stack of papers.

"Here are the details, I suppose Lance will escort you to the court."

"Yes. Sayako, get everyone to the manor and set things up, Lance, get my briefcase and let's be off."

"Hai, Kallen-sama."

Kallen walked off into the car that Schenizel held open for her. Just before the door closed, Lelouch made up his mind.

"Q-1."

She stopped short when he called her by her coveted codename before turning around to look at him.

"I need to see you when you come back. When is a suitable time?"

Kallen pulled out a phone and scrolled down a menu while Lelouch waited for an answer expectantly. Shirley stared at him before turning to look at Kallen.

"3.30, is that fine with you, your HIghness?" Kallen asked with raised eyebrows. Schenizel stared at his younger brother curiously. Lelouch nodded.

"Right, at your place then, see you Q-1."

"Thank you, your HIghness."

As the car drove away with Schenizel accompanying her, Lelouch suddenly realised that his brother was actually jealous. A smirk graced the corners of his mouth as he stared at the car that was moving off into the distance.

_How ironic, Schenizel was being jealous...of me._

Kallen rested her head on the glass of the bulletproof glass of the car, her eyes sweeping over the details of the report. She frowned, this was going to be quite difficult, it seemed. Just then, she felt a hand cover hers. She looked up to see Schenizel looking at her anxiously.

"Are you okay? Kallen, you seem rather tired," the Second Prince of Britannia asked her quietly. Kallen smiled back him and nodded.

"Yes, I'm fine. There's no need to worry about me so much. By the way, your choice of flowers are extremely pleasing this week," she said in response. Schenizel smiled briefly before his face took on a more serious expression.

"What did Lelouch go to Japan to look for you? Was there any important business?" he merely stared out of the window and sighed. Schenizel handed her a glass of water and looked away from her as she took it.

She was such a gifted woman, so like Imperial Consort Marianne, Lelouch's mother. Women like her were extremely rare and few, no wonder Lelouch always kept her by his side. Schenizel gritted his teeth as the car moved towards the court.

_Not this time, Lelouch. You can't get back a heart that has already lost its affection for you, I... will win this game._

"Ne, Lulu?"

Lelouch looked up to see Shirley standing in the doorway of his study. He shifted his position to face his wife of eight years.

"Yes, Shirley?"

Shirley didn't answer him directly. Instead, she took a seat in front of him and looked nervously at his gold fountain pen, which was a present from Cornelia for his graduation. After fidgeting for a few minutes while Lelouch waited patiently, she finally looked at him.

"Andrea told me about the talk that happened between the two of you," she whispered. Lelouch swallowed nervously, wondering where this was heading.

"Shirley, I-"

"Don't apologise," said Shirley sincerely. She looked directly at Lelouch with her honey-coloured eyes and smiled.

"I know that you love her, really Lulu," she continued, "I don't mind, if..."

"Stop it, Shirley," said Lelouch, staring at her with an atsounded expression. Getting up from his seat, he walked over to the window and stared outside into the gardens of the Imperial Aries Villa, the place that he grew up in.

"If I had married Kallen and I was still in love with you...Let's say imagine a scenario in which your position and Kallen's are reversed, Kallen would have slapped me and asked why had I married her when I was still in love with you while you..." his voice trailed off. Shirley stared at her husband's back, not comprehending his words.

"Lulu, I don't understand-"

"Of couse you don't," Lelouch's words were harsh and cold. He didn't bother turning around to look at her.

"Kallen would have done everything that you wouldn't have, to summarise it up, and that's why..." Lelouch turned around to look at Shirley. His purple eyes hard and cold, scared her as the intense look in them was nothing she had seen before. Those were the eyes of Zero, the rebel that had freed Japan from Britannia's clutches.

"You would not have understood how Kallen would have acted of she were you...Her passion, her steadiness, her determination, the fighter in her..." Lelouch's voice trailed off as he turned to look back at the gardens. Shirley stared at her husband's back before realising that he was shaking with silent sobs. His tears dripped onto the polished floor. Quietly, she got up and left the room. thinking hard to herself.

_Why does Lulu always...hide his real feelings from me?_

Lelouch stared hard at the gardens, finely trimmed and pruned. His angry yet sad tears still streamed down his cheeks as he stared at them. That was what he couldn't stand about Shirley, she was too soft, so unlike Kallen who stood firm with resolve. He wanted Kallen to be at his side again, to comfort him when he was down, to laugh with him when they triumphed and to slap him whenever he became an idiot. He wanted her to be with him so badly, his heart ached whenever he thought of her. He still remembered the day when she left him, the day when they triumphed and also the day that they lost each other...

_ Two people walked silently through the Ikaruga, saying nothing but thinking the same thing. They had triumphed, the emperor had been defeated and all the areas had been freed. They were the ones that understood the entire battle and had seen each other through it._

_ Zero and his Q-1._

_ They reached Zero's office and immediately, the mask was discarded and the uniform was slowly discarded until only the white shirt and long black pants were left. Kallen pulled off her Black Knights jacket and took off her headband as well, watching her superior button up his Ashford Academy uniform. He cocked a questioning eyebrow in her direction, earning a rather surprised look in his. _

_ "Kallen, about that promise-"_

_ "I know, Lelouch."_

_ The answer was simple, but somehow he knew that she was hiding something from him. His hands stopped their precedent up his uniform jacket and hung by his side as he neared Kallen. The redhead stared, not understanding his intention. He pulled her to the sofa there and sat her down before looking into her eyes. _

_ "You're hiding something from me, Kallen, tell me, I know," he asked her softly. Kallen looked up at him, cerulean eyes surprised at his gentleness. His hands were still on her arms, holding her gently. Looking down, she stared at the floor, biting her lower lip anxiously before looking at him in the eye and answering his statement._

_ "The royal family has offered me to join their ranks as a Knight of Round, the Knight of Four to be more exact. They will sponsor my education and they are willing to let me to go to University of Justice, Britannia to let me continue my studies and let me fulfill my dream of being a lawyer. I don't need credits and I will be directly admitted. After I finish my education, I will be accepted to work for the royal cabinet immediately. My father, has told me not to waste this opportunity and so..." she couldn't meet his eyes after telling him everything. _

_ Lelouch stared at her, not believing what she had said. He tilted her head up so that she could meet his gaze before telling her with emotion._

_ "Of course you can't waste-"_

_ "But I made a promise, Lelouch!" she cried, breaking away from him. "I made a promise with you, I can't break it...not when you've done so much for me..." her voice broke down into sobs as she shrank into the couch, her body shaking with her crying, her chest heaving. Lelouch reached forward and enveloped her in his arms, stroking her hair gently._

_ "Listen to me, Kallen," he whispered, holding her head between his hands, looking at her seriously. After some sniffling and attempts to calm herself down, she managed to look at him in the eye again. Gently, he swiped her tears away with a small kerchief and held her closer._

_ "Take that offer, Kallen. I'll wait for you, to come back, just promise me that you will-" immediately,he was shushed by a finger on his lips. Kallen stared up at him, the cerulean eyes turning back into the eyes of Kozuki Kallen, Q-1 of the Black Knights, godness of the battlefield. _

_ "Look, Lelouch, there's something that I have been meaning to tell you."_

_ He stilled at those words, said with firm resolve. Her voice was rock solid, expecting him to listen._

_ "I want you to move on without me, Lelouch. I want you to be happy with Shirley and have a family, to lead a life like you had if you had not been exiled. I don't want to take up your life now," she whispered. Lelouch couldn't believe it himself. The girl that had wanted to be acknowledged by him so much was actually telling him that she had been a bother and now she didn't want to get in his way. What had...gotten into her?_

**Phew...this chapter was rather hard to write...Anyway, PLEASE REVIEW~ I might put this story on hiatus for a while as I am having a rather bad case of writer's block...But I do appreciate your reviews~ :D**


	9. Chapter 9

Kallen walked through the door leading to the judge's seat and stood on the platform there. Immediately, the entire courtroom fell silent and stood up in one accord to greet her.

"Greetings to you, Chief Justice," chorused the entire courtroom. Kallen nodded to them before seating herself on the chair behind the platform. Gesturing tiredly, she motioned for her assistant to begin the trial. She rested her elbow on the arm of the chair and supported her head on the flat of her hand before closing her eyes. As the defendant started speaking, she slowly willed her brain to work and spot loopholes in his testment. After he had finished, she opened her eyes and glanced around the room wearily.

"Next please, the accused?"

"I will speak for myself."

Kallen's tired gaze drifted across to the young man who had stood up and was looking at her with a desperate expression. Controlling the urge to spit swear words out at him, she straightened up in her chair and motioned to him to swear the pledge that he would not commit court discrimination and begin his defence against the people who had accused him. In record time, Kallen's eyelids drooped again, but she willed her brain to stay awake and with a snap of her fingers, she motioned her assistant to take down notes. She knew that she could not take this any longer. Fatique was working its way all over her.

* * *

"Your Highness-"

"What in this sinned world are you rambling about now? I am busy, can't you see, Jeremiah?" snarled Lelouch savagely at the teal-haired man that had just entered his office. The partly cybernetic soldier blinked in surprise. Lelouch seemed to be in a surprising foul mood since ever he got back from Japan.

"No-nothing your Highness-"

"First you burst into my office screaming "your Highness" like your life depends on it and now you stand woodenly in front of me and stutter "no-nothing", what is it Jeremiah?" snapped Lelouch, glaring at said man, who looked extremely helpless under the 3rd Prince's laser-beam glare. He half-expected the prince to scream "Avada Kedavra!" and a beam of green light to burst through the room any moment.

"Well, Jeremiah Gottwald, explain your _presence_ please," spat Lelouch, his amethyst eyes boring into Jeremiah's face. Swallowing nervously, Jeremiah checked that he was not dead yet before opening his mouth.

"There was a report that a suspious-looking person has entered the Royal Court of Britannia..."

Without waiting for the full report, Lelouch had already left the room. Jeremiah was left in the prince's office with papers and a cup of cold Earl Grey tea.

* * *

"Lady Stad- I mean, Chief Justice! We request your presence immediately-"

"What is the meaning of this? You are interrupting a court case you know? And it is being presided over by the Chief Justice herself!" exploded one of the jury when Kallen opened her eyes to glance lazily at the young man that had rushed into the courtroom. He lifted his eyes hurriedly up and gasped at the man who had just scolded him.

"But sir! The E.U. has just attacked the capital city of Pendragon!"

Kallen bolted up straight at the man's words. _Lelouch._

Hushed whispers went around the room. The man on the jury merely looked infuriated.

"I don't freaking care if Emperor Charles zi Britannia has miraculously risen from the dead and wants Chief Justice Stadfeld to be ex-"

"Hold this case, Elderin, I am going there right away," barked Kallen to the man, who happened to be the head of jury. The man gasped, looking from the man to Kallen in a shocked manner.

"Bu-bu-but, Your Honour? Thi-"

"Keep quiet before I fire you!" snapped Kallen, throwing on her coat and preparing to exit the room. Lance immediately started clearing up her things while the man named Elderin frowned at the messenger before ordering disperse of court. Kallen did up the last buttons of her coat quickly and exited the room. Once she was out in ther corridor, she found herself face to face with the young man that had delievered the mesaage.

"Name and information please," demanded Kallen warily. She had not seen him around before, but she blamed it on not coming back to Britannia that often. She still remembered some old faces, the famous and the ones closer to her of course, but the new faces were complete strangers to her. _Be cautious_, she reminded herself, _he could be an assassin sent to kill you. _Assuming a pose that both casual and wary at the same time, Kallen took in the appearance if the young man in front her.

"I am Hitoshi Mayama, one of the Britannia royal army recruits," answered the young man, looking at her straight in the eyes. Tilting her head on one side, Kallen observed him silently.

"When did the royal family start taking in soldiers from the former Areas? From my knowledge, only me, Lord Kuurugi and a handful of the Black Knights are part of the units close to the royal family," asked Kallen quietly. She noticed that Mayama had started fidgeting, not something a trained soldier would do in times of emergency. She avoided direct eye contact, but kept her eyes on him all the same.

"Some ti-time ago, I believe, you must be te-terribly outdated, my lady. It was done some time ago," stuttered Mayama. He didn't even notice that he was repeating his words. That confirmed her suspicions immediately, she slowly closed it on the young proclaimed soldier.

"I believe that information was false, young Mayama. That sentence also betrayed you," smiled Kallen slyly. Her arm shot out and grabbed Mayama by the neck, throwing him down on the floor. The impact of the slam knocked him breathless and made his sight go black for a while.

When he came to his senses, he found himself looking into the barrel of a gun pointed directly at him.

"Now, talk."

**

* * *

Phew...finally finished this chapter. Sorry guys for not updating, but my End-Of-Year Examinations were coming up and they end tomorrow and I really can't study Chinese, so I finished this chapter and felt really good about it. Please drop me a review about what you think and what do you think went wrong anywhere in this story, I really appreciate it (Thanks guys XD). I will try and update more often, but I managed to get this story off hiatus. ALL HAIL DBSK FOR GIVING ME INSPRIRATION TO WRITE (ESPECIALLY XIAH XD)!**

**If interested what happened to me, please visit my blog or my Deviantart Journal, I rather not tell it over and over again~ it feels really bad when you can't finish an exam paper...**

**ALL HAIL XIAHNISM~**


	10. Chapter 10

Lelouch dashed through the corridors of the Royal Court, not caring that judges and lawyers were actually staring at him in surprise. He gasped for breath as he skidded into the entrance of the High Court of Britannia, almost into the crowd of people that were exiting the courtroom. Lance recognised him and immediately grabbed his arm, leading him to aside to talk to him. Lelouch immediately grasped the young assistant by the arms and shook him, violet eyes boring into pale blue, demanding for immediate answers.

"Where is she? Where is Kallen?" Lelouch was rigid with shock, his arms were shaking on Lance's.

"She was left with the person who interrupted the court case-"

"Shit-"

Lelouch immediately let go of Lance and sprinted down the corridor, his long coat flying out behind him. Lance stood there stunned before following the prince.

"Talk."

The word was steel out of Kallen's tongue. Pointing the gun that she was authorised to bring inside the courtroom, she stared down at him with a expressionless face. Her foot was on the man's chest, the heel digging into his heart. As she waited for the man to start talking, she kept her eyes trained on him, wary of what he would do.

He however, acted completely out of her expectation.

His eyes suddenly flared bright blue and the Geass symbol that she had never expected to see again appeared in them. Grabbing her ankle, he forced her down on the floor and wrested the gun out of her hand. Kallen hit the ground hard, and she flinched in pain as she felt his foot connect with her wrist and heard the tell-tale crack that told her that her right hand was now useless. She was stunned, she didn't even anticipate this.

"You did not expect this to happen, did you?" breathed a voice. Kallen's eyes widened. The voice was not of the masquerading soldier, but of a woman. At the same time, Kallen felt a cold finger slide down her cheek.

"Ge-geass..." she choked out.

"Yes dear, Geass," whispered the feminine voice again and the other free foot of her attacker slammed into her stomach. She choked as the feet left her body and doubled up in pain. Cold fingers grasped her face and jerked her face up to meet her attacker in the eye. Kallen simply couldn't will her body to move and she was forced to look directly into the ice-blue eyes gleaming with Geass.

"Now you die, Q-1."

Lelouch rushed down the corridor, hurling himself at a speed that he didn't know that he was capable of before turning into the corridor. He froze at the scene before him. Kallen was lying on the ground, her head forcibly pulled up with the barrel of a gun pressed to her forehead...

"Kallen!"

At the sound of his voice, the figure holding the gun whipped around a shot was immediately fired at him. Before Kallen or Lelouch could react, Lance darted in front of Lelouch and deflected the bullet. The dark figure cursed before running out of the corridor. Lance immediately rushed out after it, cocking a gun in his hand. Lelouch meanwhile slid to a stop in front of Kallen, cradling her face in his hand as he looked anxiously at her.

"Kallen! Are you okay? Kallen, answer me!"

"I'm alright," she swallowed nervously, but she was somehow vey frightened. Slowly, she grasped the front of his shirt and pulled herself up. Lelouch immediately put his hands behind her to support her. Breathing in pants, Kallen allowed him to hold her in his arms before attempting to stand on her feet. Lelouch, not trusting that she was alright, kept his hands around her. Her smaller form was shaking under his arms and after a few attempts to stand up properly while failing utterly at the same time, she let him hold her up, breathing deeply into his chest.

"Milady!"

Lelouch looked up to see Lance rushing at them. At soon as the knight skidded to a halt in front of them, Lelouch immediately let him take Kallen, aware that some nosy judges and lawyers were peeking into the corridor. There would be some pretty bad rumors flying around the next half of the day if he wasn't careful and Schenizel wouldn't be vey happy about it. Gritting his teeth, he motioned for Lance to take her outside to his car. The chaffeur cocked his head in surprise, but kept his mouth shut as Lelouch shot him a death glare.

It was a long ride back to the Stadfeld mansion as Kallen was not even looking at him. She rested her head on the velvet back of his carseat, her eyes closed. Lance looked at him in the rearview mirror with silent, thoughtful eyes, before shaking his head. He looked over at his ace, drinking in her slender form that was rested on the carseat. Red hair tumbled out of the braid onto her back, spilling over her body like a waterfall. She was simply beautiful, like she had always been.

Abruptly, the car came outside the Stadfeld mansion, Kallen's eyes snapping open in unison with the stopping. Immediately, she threw the car door open and flounced up to the gates, leaving behind a rather flustered Lance.

'Kallen."

The voice was low, powerful, commanding. The same voice that she had listened to back in their days as a Black Knight, the very same voice that stopped her. She stopped dead in her tracks, but didn't turn around to look at him. She felt the weight of his stare grinding into her back, but simply refused to turn around. Lance stood there quietly, unsure of what to do. It wasn't until the big gates started to open and Lord Stadfeld bustled out of the mansion, looking slightly unnerved by the situation. Kallen swept past her father, not looking at Lelouch at all as she walked up to the front door before entering the house. Lance stood rooted to the spot, blinking rapidly while trying to digest what had happened.

"Your Highness?"

Lord Stadfeld's soft voice drew Lelouch's attention away from Kallen's back. Looking to the noble, he nodded.

"Yes?"

"I'll talk to Kallen about it, I'll make sure she apologise-"

"There's no need to do so."

It was now Lord Stadfeld's turn to blink rapidly in confusion. Meanwhile, a shout of "Lance!" came from inside the house, prompting Lance to snap out of his trance and rush inside the house. Lelouch turned around so that he was now eye-to-eye to Kallen's father, who waited patiently for him to start. The man's cerulean eyes, identical to Kallen's stared unblinkingly at him, showing his intelligence and also fatherly concern for his daughter. He waited patiently for the prince to speak, his red hair flying about in the wind that suddenly swept the compound.

"Don't worry about it, Lord Stadfeld, it's alright."

"That's precisely what I'm worried about, my lord." Lord Stadfeld's handsome face crunched up in worry for a moment before smoothing out. "I have not been blind to the rumors that have been spreading out since you announced a visit to Japan without the company of your wife-" the noble's eyes narrowed at the mention of the visit. Before he attempted to continue, he was interrupted by Lelouch.

"Do not speak about it," murmured Lelouch in a dangerous voice, so dangerous that Lord Stadfeld immediately stopped what he was about to say. The expression in the prince's eyes told him that he did not want to speak about the topic with anyone anymore. Silently, Lord Stadfeld bowed his head, knelt down and addressed the prince in a formal manner.

"Very well then, your Highness, I wil refrain from bringing up this topic anymore. If you'll excuse me, I'm not in the time to see your car off. I apologise for that," replied Lord Stadfeld in a cold tone before standing up and walking back into the mansion. Lelouch stood there, his eyes glazed over with fustration before he entered his car again, flinging his head back against the seat that Kallen had occupied before. Inhaling in her scent deeply, he clutched at the fabric. His eyes snapped open as he suddenly realised something.

_I miss her...more than I actually think I do..._

Burying his face in his hands, he broke down into sobs as he clawed at his heart, trying to quell the pain there. However, there was nothing that could replace the ripping sensation in his chest. There was only one remedy to heal him, to make him himself, to make him smile again. That remedy however, had just refused to heal him.

Kallen watched Lelouch's car drive off, dressed now in a simple black shirt with knee-length denims. She collapsed down beside the wall, tears forming in her eyes as she slammed her head against it. She gripped her aburn tresses in her hand, clentching it so tightly that it hurt, but she didn't care. It was nothing compared to the pain that was ripping through her chest, making her seem like a pathetic little girl again, like that time when her brother died. She grabbed at her heart, choking on howls that echoed throughout the room.

She still loved him, why was that so hard for her admit it? Now, seeing him walk away from her again was like being in the 18th pit of hell, relieving the most terrible events in her life again. Every part of her body craved his touch again, every part of her mind wanted his attention again and most of all, every part of her heart wanted his love again. She couldn't live without him loving her again. She wanted him, she wanted her Zero, she wanted her leader...

...but most of all, she wanted Lelouch to be hers again...

Lady Yuuko Stadfeld-Kozuki looked at her daughter with a worried expression on her face. She didn't want to see her like this, but she didn't dare to try comforting her either. Now she only could watch her cry from outside her room, helpless. Just then, she felt arms around her. Loooking up, she found herself looking into her husband's eyes, who quietly told her not to do anything. Bowing her head, she leaned into her husband's embrace, trying to think of a way to console her daughter.

Lord William Stadfeld looked quietly at Kallen, keeping his arms around Yuuko, the wife that he had reclaimed after Area 11 was turned back into Japan. He knew that Kallen had loved Lelouch deeply and the prince also had indescrible feelings for his daughter as well. He didn't know how to approach Kallen, nor didn't he know how to face Prince Lelouch again. Leaning his head against his wife's, he closed his eyes as he let Kallen cry.

For now, they could only let her do so.

**YAY! OTHER CHAPPIE FINALLY! Oh yeah, officially got this story off hiatus XDDD**


	11. Anothe update

hey guys,

I'm sorry for the shock and false surprise I gave you regarding this chapter. I just want to tell you guys that I will be updating my stories by the start of July and I will take another long break as I have to prepare for a competition and I have to go to the doctor's as well. I just came back from holiday where my mum took away my laptop and I couldn't write :((

By the way, updates for my fanfiction can be found on my blog as I tend to update there more often :) hope it really helps! I have random posts in between, but you can ignore them. I won't be updating that soon as I am kinda caught up in life's tornado now. I will not trouble you guys about me, but I am very task-oriented and I will give you all the chapters that I have promised. I'm still recovering, but don't worry, that won't tamper with my writing. I will update as soon as possible and well, guess that's all.

Thank you, may we meet again until my next update or new story.

lost-dreams17


	12. Chapter 11

"We will need to send some skilled knights, the Purists maybe? To the place itself. We cannot expect to triumph with just normal soldiers," said Schenizel thoughtfully as he looked at the analysis of the rebels' headquarters spread out across the map. Lelouch, seated opposite his brother, nodded in response to his brother's statement. Drumming his fingers absentmindedly on the arm of his chair, he concentrated on the music blasting in his left ear rather than the distracting flipping sounds of papers around him.

_My heart is cold, I didn't know love.(1)_

"Lelouch?"

"Hmm?" he mumbled back, focusing his attention on the drumbeats and the powerful vocals of the vocalist rather than listen to the question posed to him. His attention was cut off when the earplug was rudely ripped out of his ear, causing complete silence to fall on the prince's ears. Glaring at Cornelia, who held his MP3 player away from him and the earbuds as well, Lelouch shifted in his chair, aware of his siblings staring at him.

"Lelouch, you have not been paying attention to our discussion about dealing with the EU," stated Schenizel smoothly as Lelouch's eyes followed his MP3 player into Cornelia's pocket. Sensing that his younger brother was still not paying attention to him, Schenizel snapped his fingers in front of Lelouch's face, drawing his attention to him. Lelouch looked back to his brother, an irritated expression on his face as he settled back into his chair.

"What?" snapped the irritated prince as he looked from face to face. Schenizel heaved an exsperated sigh before setting the papers in front of Lelouch, who looked across them with a trained eye before snapping his gaze back to the 2nd Prince.

"I was listening-"

"No you weren't!" snapped Cornelia. Lelouch switched his glare to her immediately.

"At least pause the music before you rip the earbuds out of my ears!" threw Lelouch back as Cornelia's expression equaled his own. Nunnally and Euphemia, sensing the brewing of a fight, immediately put themselves in between their quarreling siblings.

"Big sister, please stop-"

"Big brother, it's not go-"

"Just stop bitching, the two of you. You're acting like spoilt kids," intervened Schenizel evenly. Cornelia and Lelouch shut up obediently, glaring at each other hatefully. It was really kind of amusing, and somehow annoying at the same time.

"I know you weren't listening Lelouch, I know," sighed Schenizel, taking the papers back from Lelouch.

"I want to send a few Knights of Round to the E.U. base there to investigate," stated Schenizel. Everyone's eyes turned to him. Cornelia's features were of utter disbelief while Euphemia gasped in shock. Lelouch stared at his brother, speechless. They were not the only ones; the entire royal family was gazing at the Second Prince with mixed expressions. It remained that way before Carine finally spoke.

"You're going to risk...our final line of protection?"

"They _are _the Knights of Round," said Schenizel quietly.

"I object," interjected Cornelia, standing up furiously to glare at her older brother. The so-called Witch of Britannia slammed her cletched fists on the table, surprising everyone, even Schenizel who raised a questioning eyebrow to her actions.

"They are our last attempt, they are the most skilled Knightmare pilots out there. We only send them out when there is no hope left. Now does this situation look hopeless to you?" spat Cornelia, her fists trembling on the table. Lelouch took this chance to sneak his MP3 player from her pocket, but merely tucked it inside his jacket. Schenizel's expression remained passive.

"It's for the best. We need someone who can blend in there skilfully and protect him or herself when needed to, and right now the only candidate I can think of it-" he was cut off by Lelouch throwing the files on the table at him, which ended crashing off the table. Now, even Cornelia was taken aback by this unusually violent action from Lelouch, who did not usually take out his anger physically. The prince's eyes were wide with rage, his thin form trembling with the brunt of his emotions.

"You mean Kallen, don't you?" he whispered, his voice dangerous and soft. The two siblings glared at each other across the table; this time Schenizel didn't bother hiding his feelings anymore, he glared openly at his own brother. After holding the gaze for 5 minutes, which seemed like hell to everyone present at the meeting, Lelouch picked up the expandable file that he had brought in with him and pulled out a stack of papers detailed with attack strategies. He threw them across to Schenizel before taking his jacket off his chair.

"That's what I have thought up for the solution. Now if you please excuse me, I'll be going," snapped the Demon Prince as he pulled his cellphone out of his pocket and started tapping on the touch screen, walking to the door as he did so. The entire room stared at him, bewildered at his actions.

"If you are thinking of telling Kallen, let me tell you that she already knows, and has agreed."

Lelouch stopped dead in his tracks at Schenizel's words. Everyone knew that Schenizel had just dug his own grave and there was no way that he could back out of this one. The atmosphere in the room was so thick that a knife would have cut through it.

Without warning, Lelouch whipped around and grabbed Schenizel, yanking his older brother up by the front of his shirt. Gasps sounded throughout the room and Lelouch pressed his face closer to Schenizel, both of them seething with fury, glaring into each other eyes.

"You don't control her," he seethed, his hands trembling with anger and the effort of holding up his brother, who was much heavier than him. Schenizel glared back at him head on, his teeth grinding as his violet eyes met his brother's identical ones.

"You don't control her either. Don't forget, Lelouch, you are _married_," hissed the 2nd Prince venomously. That was the killing blow for Lelouch as he threw Schenizel back into his chair, yelled some vuglarities at him before storming out of the room. The entire royal family was silent, with Nunnally, Euphemia and Odysseus staring worriedly at the door that Lelouch had slammed shut. Schenizel sat up and adjusted his shirt, his expression still of vengence.

"Let's postpone this meeting."

Lelouch stormed down the hall to the Knights of Round private quarters as he desperately tried to control his fury. When he arrived in the common room that all twelve knights shared, the Knight of One, Bismarck Waldstein looked up at him from a thick book.

"Looking for Kallen?"

"No. Suzaku," Lelouch desperately tried to control his bursting feelings. Bismarck merely pursed his lips in surprise. sensing the prince's chaotic feelings.

"Fourth room on the right," came a quiet voice. Lelouch turned to see the Knight of Five, Nonette Engram standing in the doorway that he had just entered. She made a slight bow at him before walking off to one of the side rooms, shedding her coat as she did so. Bismarck shrugged before raising his book, entitled "Angels and Demons"(2) to cover his face, showing that he didn't want to talk. Lelouch murmured his thanks to Nonette, who was busy replacing her soiled boots with clean slippers, nodded at Bismarck before walking to the right corridor. Stopping in front of the door with the name "Suzaku Kururugi" on it, he took a deep breath before knocking.

* * *

"Lelouch?"

A surprised Suzaku greeted Lelouch at the door before standing aside to let him come it. Plopping down on Suzaku's bed, the ebony-haired prince glared up at the plain ceiling. Suzaku moved cautiously to the side, seating himself in the chair at his study table that had a detailed map of the E.U. continents. He had obviously been studying it before Lelouch had knocked on his door.

"So, what happened?"

"Did you know that Kallen is going to be sent to infiltrate the E.U. base?" asked Lelouch emotionlessly as he stared up at the ceiling. Suzaku remained silent. Lelouch sat up on the bed and looked over at his best friend, who was staring at the floor of his bedroom.

"Yes," murmured Suzaku. Looking up at Lelouch, he sighed heavily. "I tried to stop her, or just even stall her from answering, but she immediately promised Schenizel," Suzaku shook his head. Lelouch remained silent, closing his eyes as he took a deep breath.

"Where is she?"

"Probably at her private apartment," shrugged Suzaku, picking up his cell phone and flipping it open. Snapping it shut after finding no new updates, he threw in onto the bed and stood up. Patting Lelouch on the shoulder, he bowed his head.

"Get her back."

Lelouch's eyes widened at his best friend's words, but he nodded. Standing up, he gave Suzaku a "man hug" before walking out of the room, pulling out his phone to call his chaffeur. Plugging in the earbuds as he waited for him, Lelouch turned on the MP3 player, annoyed that Cornelia had not paused the music that was put on shuffle. However, he stilled when he heard the lyrics sung by the powerful female voice.

_Sometimes whenI feel like crying, I remember our beautiful relationship;  
Please don't suffer anymore, and please don't cry~(3)_

The prince's lips curved up in a smile. He would not let her suffer anymore; they would continue the beautiful relationship they had originally. It didn't matter, he wouldn't have to get a divorce; he just had to get her back and see her safe and sound. That was more than he could ever wish for.

He wouldn't let her cry anymore.

**A/N **

**(1) Translated lyrics from F.T. Island's "Love Love Love" *I love that song!*  
(2) Kinda random, sounds like the kind of books the Knights of Round would read. *I love Dan Brown too!, especially "The Da Vinci Code*  
(3) Translated lyrics from Park Bom's "Don't Cry". *I'm not a 2NE1 fan, but I love this song!***

**Sorry I took so long for this chappie! Again, reviews are loved and appreciated, so do please give me your opinion on the progression of the story!**


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